What. The Forghe. Ees thad??????There ees a theen', a beeg blag theen' arn the house where I gard storck arn the 2nd floor two years ago an' where the Wooman had to rescue me. My gard. The way she talghe abou' deed you swear eed was Eberesd weeth sherpas an' arxygen tangh. I hel' arn to hor weeth my arms while she clime' bag orp the iron ladder arn the ou' side ob the beeldeen' afthair peeckeen me orp frarm the weendow, where I was screameen' Help! Help! Por worn day she had poot Larst Cad notices onder all the doors een the neighbourhood. Lade the secon' ebeneen' she fine' me.
Larst, whyporque? Because there was carnstrarction worghairs arn my roop. Stompastompastompa. An' I ran.
I smell....c.a.r.n.s.t.r.a.rc.t.i.o.n. worghairs....bangabangabanga arn Sonday, blordy Sonday.
So I sharpen my claws to spreeng eento action.
I wash my pands een case I mos' go een ambulance to harspeetal aftair the battle, an' the Wooman says I should have clean pands.
I breathe deep an' medeetade to plan my mobes.
I yam Don Estorbo de la Bodega Dominicana.Trespassers weell be prarsecuded. I weell maghe an alliance weeth El Bandido. After thad I weel keeck his ass. Thees ees my blarck!
Heear me roar:
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!
them bandidos is no good inna fite, hermano. kinda timid, Mine says, frr all theyr reputation as elsewise.
ReplyDeleteglad to see you outta them sissy manpands -- whaddya call that color, razbrrry? -- and back intta yor respektibble blag for. blag gose wit evrrthin. razbrry not so much.
az evrrr,
~^:^~
Are the carnstrarction worghairs responsible for the beeg, blag theen'? What is the beeg, blag theen' anyway? And regarding your dealings with the Bandido, hermano -- they are not to be trusted ... cuidate!
ReplyDeleteHallow een, my frien'...man, I was nard een the manpands by my own weell. I was hattaghed by the yoomans.
ReplyDeleteIkaika - the blag theen' says the Wooman ees Scarffholdeen'. I no onnerstan' neither. You see eed een Peecture Numero Uno, blag ad the en' ob my blarg, righd orp to my roop.
You make me laugh out loud, Estorbo! You and your adventures and your friends too.
ReplyDeleteBut keep safe.
Mine says s-c-a-f-f-o-l-d-i-n-g is a kinda ladder, but big lyke a box wit shelves to stnd on. [i doan cee how that makes it any cleerer.] an she noes this she sez cause her grandddy, an a cupla unkuls, an a cuzzin wrr carnstrarction worghairs, called c-a-r-p-e-n-t-e-r. doan noe myself whut that iz but Mine seems vrry shurr uv thiz poynt. must be sumpin the Woomans just noe. i'd keep away frrm it. if it comes up to yer roop it mus go down to the strreet an strreeets can be bad noos. corse, yerrr more advenchurus than me... but still, like blackbrrd sez, keep safe.
ReplyDeletean hiya blackbrrd, yer prrtty advenchurus yerself to be sittin in wit all these cats.
~^:^~
Dinah says don't try for alliance with the bandido. Sharp teeth, maybe, but not much for the battle.
ReplyDeleteWe have a new neighbour - another blardy darg. Dinah says mini fox terrier. We say "humph! hssss-spitt!"
I am not afraid of you cats- you just make me laugh- caw, caw, caw.
ReplyDeleteBesides, I am black like you.
it's a peecibble kingdum. peece is good. corse the being able ta fly prrt must come in handy in not so peecibble kingdums.
ReplyDelete~^:^~
Estorbo, get better fast man, we miss you! Take care!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteHermano, I just read Beence's comment ... are you sick?
ReplyDeleteIkaika - yes, Estorbo is seeck.
ReplyDeleteI think he is getting better: his old non-peeing problem, with a very bad experience at a new vet yesterday, and then the emergency room after the new vet would not treat him. Long story.
I switched his food recently to wet and he has been drinking less water - not the water I used to give him with his dry food, so he would drink enough - and that is what caused the problem. But he has peed today, after being catheterized yesterday, and he has painkillers and antibiotics. I was quite beside myself with worry, but the kitty is washing his face as we speak, and ate his breakfast (his appetite never disappeared!!! - even drugged and unable to stand he tried to make for his food bowl), and I'm about to pop another pill into him.
He traumatized two vets' staffs, but I believe they deserved it. You don't squeeze the Don like that without consequences. He was so scared and in pain. Ugh. Today is better.
More water, more peeing will be good.
Ah, man ... we're so sorry that you are having peeing problems, but very relieved to hear that you are doing better today. The female human's first cat was prone to urinary blockages and had to be catheterized a couple of times, so we sympathize with your pain and fear. But the vet put him on acidifying pills, which he took for the rest of his life (he lived to be 21!), and he was good after that.
ReplyDeleteHermano, do you like to drink water from the faucet? If so, you might want to ask the Wooman to get you a Drinkwell fountain. We've seen posts all around the cat blogosphere by cat bloggers who use the fountain and they say it encourages cats to drink more water.
Big purrs comin' at ya' from me, and the humans send healing vibes and chin scricthes...
Oh Estorbo, those vet visits are so humiliating to a big man like you! Get better soon. I will miss you for a few weeks bercause I am going away. But when I come back I will catch up on all your news. Stay strong.
ReplyDelete