Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Aclimatizeen'
Read the sobteghs, Wooman...I yam nard happy to be een thees red code again.
Bod you corm home, thad's grade. I yam so happy to be nard sobyeghded to the acousteec bass guitar no more. My eears can stan' orp again. I can corm oud ob the clahr-sed. No mas hideen'.
Escuse me? I deed nard heear you...eardrom prarblem. Oh. Yes, comprendo. You cannard onnerstan' me because thees ees all sobteghs an' I yam actuallee silen' an' you doan' do sobtle?
OK. Led me theenk...
I'm theenkeen'...
....
Theenkeen...(thees ees painful).
OKOKOK! I gard eed: waid por eed, waid por eed...waid por eed...
Prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
?
...
OK?
OK.
Bod you corm home, thad's grade. I yam so happy to be nard sobyeghded to the acousteec bass guitar no more. My eears can stan' orp again. I can corm oud ob the clahr-sed. No mas hideen'.
Escuse me? I deed nard heear you...eardrom prarblem. Oh. Yes, comprendo. You cannard onnerstan' me because thees ees all sobteghs an' I yam actuallee silen' an' you doan' do sobtle?
OK. Led me theenk...
I'm theenkeen'...
....
Theenkeen...(thees ees painful).
OKOKOK! I gard eed: waid por eed, waid por eed...waid por eed...
Prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
?
...
OK?
OK.
Sunday, March 21, 2010
The homecarmeen'
The Wooman walgh een the door. She say, Estorbo!!!!!
I say, Wooman.
She say: Estorbo, I meess' you!
I say, OK...
She corm and stroghe me, keess me. Gard.
The Smoothman corm an' say hello.
Hola, I say. Whaddup?
Para two days the Wooman ees sayeen' to me, Estorbo, when weell you porr?
I say, Wooman, I weell porr when I yam good and ready. An' I ain' ready.
Eef you meess my porreen' press the play bortorn arn my blarg. Si'e bar: tarp righ'.
You doan' leab me por two mornths an' then ged me to porr por you.
I hab standar's.
I say, Wooman.
She say: Estorbo, I meess' you!
I say, OK...
She corm and stroghe me, keess me. Gard.
The Smoothman corm an' say hello.
Hola, I say. Whaddup?
Para two days the Wooman ees sayeen' to me, Estorbo, when weell you porr?
I say, Wooman, I weell porr when I yam good and ready. An' I ain' ready.
Eef you meess my porreen' press the play bortorn arn my blarg. Si'e bar: tarp righ'.
You doan' leab me por two mornths an' then ged me to porr por you.
I hab standar's.
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Adyosmen' ob status
I was yos geddeen' use' to thees bachelor libe.
Goeen' to bed ad dawn. Sleebeen' teell noon. Eadeen' cheeps an' dreenkeen' beer. Leesteneen' to corteen' edge music arn my iPawd.
All ees larst. The yoomans are retorneen'.
Beeg forgheen' deal.
You leab me, you theenk you can corm bag an' I weell say WELCORM home, my lorbeen' yoomans???!!!
No.
I doan' theenk so.
You doan' lorb me. You yos need me por carmeec reliep.
Fonny cad, haha, make-a us laugh.
Do you lorb me?
I meess you...
Pee ess: BREENG FEESH!
Pee Pee Ess. WHY deed I lose worn Followhair? Why, porque, whadeedIdo???Am I nard goo' deenorf? Nard hansome enorf? My wrideen' ees nard eenspireen'?
You wan' naked peectures?
Goeen' to bed ad dawn. Sleebeen' teell noon. Eadeen' cheeps an' dreenkeen' beer. Leesteneen' to corteen' edge music arn my iPawd.
All ees larst. The yoomans are retorneen'.
Beeg forgheen' deal.
You leab me, you theenk you can corm bag an' I weell say WELCORM home, my lorbeen' yoomans???!!!
No.
I doan' theenk so.
You doan' lorb me. You yos need me por carmeec reliep.
Fonny cad, haha, make-a us laugh.
Do you lorb me?
I meess you...
Pee ess: BREENG FEESH!
Pee Pee Ess. WHY deed I lose worn Followhair? Why, porque, whadeedIdo???Am I nard goo' deenorf? Nard hansome enorf? My wrideen' ees nard eenspireen'?
You wan' naked peectures?
Friday, March 5, 2010
I'm steell standeen'
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