blank'/> The Libe ob Don Estorbo de la Bodega Dominicana: You call me El Gordo

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

You call me El Gordo

Why mos' the Wooman taghe thees onflattereen' peecture ob me? Ees terreeble.

She maghe me loogh como un perro. A d.a.r.g. A doberman peench-hair, to be esssact.

So, sormbardy as' the order day how moch I weigh. So rude. An' Liu, I theenk, called me El Gordo. So rude.

Liu, check oud your aria een Turandot. The Wooman use' to torture me weeth eed an' I had to bighd hor har' een the leg to maghe her starp. My pobre ears. You know whad happens een the en' righd? Liu corms to a steecky en'! Ees 'cos you call me GORDO!

I yam nard gordo. I hab beeg bones and larnglegs. Ees true I am a beeg cad. BEEG. Nard fad.

Here is Callas, yos to teach you a Lesson.

So. Doan' call me names. Like El Gordo. I can poneesh you with OPERA!

You see the holes onner the arms so I can maghe stretch. I corm oud ob my short twice las' nigd. They are loogheen' for a new worn. Dayeen, dayoud.

You see the new Poll orp there arn the righ', righd? Ees to guess how moch I yam weigheen'. The Wooman had to ged arn the scale weeth me so then she saw how moch SHE weigh'. Jaaaaaaaaajajajajajaja. Eep jaja, ees so fonny.

Hey! How you fine' me here, Wooman? Ees secret!

Be careful ob my talons. I yam panth-hair een the yongle.

Si, you forghard to cleep my claws deedn' you? Be afrai'.

Be berber' afrai'.


  1. Estorbo, you have been in quite a mood lately..Is it that Fall is in the air?

  2. Oh! Your handsome nose...purrfection!

  3. OPERA torture! Hadn't counted on that one ...

    The human LORBS your nose, hermano. She makes keesie noises in front of the computhair whenever she sees pictures like that. Then she says, with those eyes, Don Es could never be mistaken for a perro!

  4. Ooh, Estorbo, thank you for the post, with the beautiful piece of opera-torture.
    my english is soooo bad, sorry: you are'nt gordo but spaguetti are dangerous if your humans are so good cuisiniers.

  5. Quiero Don Estorbo;

    Hank from the Heights says "hola."

  6. Turandot! Ouch! That's a horrid way to go. Dinah sometimes plays it and we go away. Too many high-up notes!
    But this morning, I,Geiger, walked on the keyboard and turned on the booma-booma-clacker-clacker noise.And she didn't know how to turn it off.
    It was, you would say, ber'ber' fonnee!

  7. Estorbo, I think you need a nice manicure from the Wooman, yes?

  8. Estorbo, I think you need a nice manicure from the Wooman, yes?

  9. Estorbo, I love Opera. Poneesh me Poneesh me!


  10. I have often wondered how much you weighed but i didn't want to insult either you or your good cooking woman.

    But the gloves are off big boy and I like opera. I also like country, be glad she isn't torturing you with that.

    Can we vote mote than once?

  11. Nessun dorma....nessun dorma....oh Storbie...if not with Turandot, there's always Mahler!

  12. I went over and took your weight poll. I weigh in at about 19 lb. and consider myself very manly. It's all muscle and I'm not fat at all, so that's what I guessed for you.


  13. so, Estorbo - man of substance, how much you weigh amigo? we, your fans wait weeth anteeceepation.

  14. Ah..El are such a beautiful young man..I am enthralled with your beautiful rich black fur and your golden colored eyes...