Me an' my igloo

Peectures: the Smoothman

 

Sheet.

 

Whad ees thees?

 

Ber' eenteresteen'...

 

Pelleds!

Breeng arn the Ice Age, hombres! I yam ready!!!

For had

Pappa The Smoothman ees cormeen' arn the train frarm Montreal to sleep weeth me por two nighds before he goes to Afreeca to see the Wooman. Moch snow ees predeected. Maybe he ged storck.

Eef he geds cole' een the snow I weell seet arn his head to make him warm again.

Eep.

 

Eed ees cole', y I yam wrabbed een my chashmere blanket.  Ees sarft. The Wooman an' me, we share thees blanket. Worn day, larng ago, she cort eed een halb. I gard worn halb, she gard the order halb. She wear eed as scarf. Sormtimes, when I feel lighe I yab larst my keettens, she wrab me een the blanket.

 

Soon the suitcases corm oud an' they weell leab me. Again. 

 

Why?

Maybe they are goeen' to loogh por my keettens.

Dayeen...

The Wooman cannard coogh, so I had to help hor feegure oud how to maghe souffle. The mose' eemportan' par' was wheeskeen' the cream. I hab wheeskhairs, I tole' hor, ob course I shoul' be wheeskeen' the cream!

I tell you, thad Wooman has a hard ob stone.

So I gabe orp my cream dreams an' sad an' wadged the snow florries. Ees lighe a beeg cad ees pulleen' oud the feathhairs ob a leedle whide bor'.

Ay. I yam so hongree.

Pee Ess: I yam now worgheen' por SETI. I weell be weareen' the bastardcollhair por ebber. An' ebber. An ebber.

(We are nard alone.)

Friday news

Major braghethrough arn the terrace yesserday: the Wooman ad las' wen' oud an' deed sorm worgh. She ees berber' lazee. Terrace looghs lighe sheet. Por mornths I yab nard been able to maghe scratcha arn my larg. Las plantas wor een the way. Why are las plantas more eemportant than me?! Bod las' nighd I made scratcha teell the spleent-hairs wor flyeen'!

Een order news. The bue collar: same ole' same ole'. Sormtime' when eed ees folded bag I can leeck my bagleg: leeckaleeckaleecka! Then the Wooman shoud ESTORBO an' I maghe myself flad an' she peeck me orp an' roll me ober an goes, Seelly Cad! Then she wash my leg and pud the cream arn an' pud me bag arn my legs an' fole' the collar forwar' again. Lighe cone, ligh satellide deesh. My gard. I heear too moch. So moch soun' een the worl'. Bod now I cannard reach my leg. Ees...como si dices...eenfureeadeen'!

I steell play weeth streeng ebery day. The Smoothman says I yam goeen' loco. I play weeth streeng lighe I yam goeen' to KEELL eed. So? I yam goeen' to keell eed! An' I weell keell them eef they ged een the way!

I maghe yompa arn the roop, sometime' weethoud the collar. The Smoothman say the collar ees bad por balance, an' maybe I ged storck sormwhere, lighe the time I lefd my short arn the fire escabe ob the bandido. The Wooman ees more, lighe, whadebber? Bod I know eef I go meesseen' she weell corm an' rescue me.

There are carnstrarction worghairs arn the house ob the bandido. They ebeected heem. So I no go there no mas. I hade worghairs

 Time por a nab. My nighds are so essausteen'. The labender squort bardle terrorizes me so now I only eep ad 5 or 6 am.  Taghes so moch energy to sopress the eep.