I yad a berber' bad dream. Nighd. Mare.
Ad fors' eed ees good. I dream I yam ad Momofuku an' there ees thees wonnerful platt-hair ob cheecken weengs. I yam so essited to be eadeen' thees special or-dair whad ees usually por the whole table, an' eed ees yos me, Estorbo, alone een the restaurant, weeth all thees fry cheecken. Then the cheecken torn eento an abalanche, ees raineen' raineen' cheecken cheecken, an' I yam bein' buried alibe, nooooooooooo!
I yam on-dair the mountayn ob weengs.
I yam goeen' to die.
Dios mio.
Bod then ees cormeen' Dabeed Chang weeth the abolanch pole, deegeen' down eento the weengs to fine' signs ob libe. He ees lookeen' por me, Don Estorbo! He knows I yam buried! He ees goeen' to rescue me!
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep I yam down here ad the bardarm ob the weengs! I cry.
Poghe poghe, Ow! He fine me! He deeg me oud! I yam safe!
Bod no, he ees loogheen' ad me. He say, Whad a nice FAD cad, he mos weigh abou' 19lbs: yos whad I need por tonigh's especial arn the menu.
...
An' he torns me eento carnfit ob cad een bacon fad.
An' he sorbs me weeth Beeb lettuce leabes an' raw oyst-hairs arn the side.
An' the Smoothman an' the Wooman corm een. An' they ORE-DAIR me!
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....I knew eed woul' en' lighe thees.
If you can tame him, eat him!
ReplyDeleteAt least you're in at Momofuku!
ReplyDeleteI woul' prefer you poached weeth bok choy an a begetable peelaf medley dreezled weeth a ligh' beenegrette perhaps....
ReplyDeletefat is unfair - generous is mucho bedhair
Oh, darling. This just shows the enormity of the strain you're under. Something *must* be done. But what??? I have to go lie down now.
ReplyDeleteSilly boy. Such melodrama. They will only eat you if there's a famine. Watch out for the freezer becoming empty......
ReplyDeleteOoops, and I went for 22 lbs. Twice.
ReplyDeleteI'll never ask you to judge my weight or age sir.
what a terrible dream! probably means you didn't have enough snacks before bedtime...
ReplyDeleteMy poor big boy! It's a restaurant, you say? I thought you were saying a really bad curse word! I'm too ladylike to tell you what I thought.
ReplyDeleteEmma, the cat in Iowa
If I only read two last posts I would assume the dream showed pure guilt from waking up humans at night so many times, but.. I read all the previous posts and I know you not very familiar with the term
ReplyDelete"guilt" :)
Wow, Estorbo...what did you eat before bed to have such a wild and crazy dream? You are a delicious cad, but not to eat! Instead, to savor with ones eyes. For you are indeed a fine spcimen of a feline. After all that trauma, did you ever get to taste the chicken wings before they burried you?
ReplyDeleteRestaurant! Oh-h-h-h, I thord ju was asweareen een cadSpanish...I feel soh seelly :-)
ReplyDelete