blank'/> The Libe ob Don Estorbo de la Bodega Dominicana: July 2013

Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Tuesday, July 23, 2013

The whide wheeskhair an' the forgheen barx


Pleease. Obserb my whide wheeskhair.

You see?

Ees stresswheeskair ob radioactebeedy in May.

Bod the Wooman say I mos' tell you, een case you do nard read my Fazebooogh page, I yam A-OK.

I yam officially cure' ob the typhoid.

I wen' por forgheen' blordtes' weeth Dr Slade y eberytheen' ees NORMAL. Eben my keedneys, whad maghe me dreenk mucho agua.

Yessep' I yab the whide stresswheeskhair.

Also, order news, the Wooman threw away, por ebber y ebber, my Onnatracteeb Grey Barx. Een the trash.


She say: Estorbo, you nebber hab to see thad theen' ebber again. Eed ees an abommeenation.

Een the Onnatracteeb Grey Barx I wen' to the harspeetal por the nuclear essplocion een my thyroid. Een the barx I was taghen orpstade to be eencarcerade' weeth gerbeel entertainmen' y 24 hour bideo sorbeillance.

Een the barx weeth taxi I came bag home.

Een the barx I wed my pants.

I nebber, ebber web my pands. Was terreeble.

I was wash' een the bath. I yos stood there een the warm wardhair while the Woooman clean me.

Forgheen' barx.

The barx ees dead.

Estorbo ees alibe.

Hear me roar: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!

Monday, July 22, 2013

De-wormeen' the sheep.


Leabeen' weeth libestarck ees nard easy.

Hey!

Hola?

Pappa?  I mean, Smoothman!

...

These sheep has WORMS!


I tole you.


Friday, July 5, 2013

The forr flew


I yam wornce more een carntrol ob thees blarg.

Eed was nard easy.

Eed was nard preedy.

I yad to do sorm beesnees weeth sorm formhair associade' frarm my deestan' pas'.

Also, I yad to call the fire depar'men'.

Bod Estorbo ees bag.

Monday, July 1, 2013

Poo to your strong cat tactics!


Estorbo. This is Maggie.

This is my fireside address:

Ted is still nursing some bent whiskers and a sore knee.

Yes. We did meet those "friends" of yours. From Colombia. Or was it Havana?

Frankly, that wasn't very nice. Not cricket, at all.

While we refuse to negotiate with terrorists, especially ones with thick accents and bad grammar, we have made one concession: The Woman looked cold in her tree so we moved her.

She is now in the chimney.

We have friends, too. We are Welsh, you know.

No, you probably don't.

Gutter cat.