blank'/> The Libe ob Don Estorbo de la Bodega Dominicana: The Woman's Statement

Monday, September 14, 2009

The Woman's Statement

This is the Woman speaking...I've had to hack the cat's account: his password was pelledsnow. Took a while but I cracked it.

He really has all his friends wrapped around his little pad so I must set things straight. He is not dying, not sick, not starved and not thin. He weighs 19lbs, naked.

His vocal begging starts between 4-5am. On a good day he begs at about 5.30am and he gets fed, then...If he begs from Vince his approach is more like the cartoon cat: he pushes his arms, gives him love bites, pushes his nose on his face. For me he goes somewhere inaccessible and tears pieces of paper, as that works faster.

Once he is fed he comes back to my side of the bed and sleeps. Much of the day. In the afternoon around 4.30 or 5 (since Vince is home right now) he starts eeping for his 6pm pellets. Or he sleeps. Once he's had those, he washes and sleeps again, rousing himself around our dinner time, where, I'm afraid, he is given tidbits of meat or cheese from the table. Also any fruit he likes. Then he goes out hunting for katydids, which he likes for dessert. Later he comes in, goes to bed and makes buns before sleeping.

So he's not sick, his thyroid is, I imagine, fine.

He is a larger than life cat, and exaggerates terribly. He loves an audience. He is in the entertainment business. He is a drama queen.

He also adores pellets. He will eat them till he blows up.

Worry not.

8 comments:

  1. call the social worker!! (you let him go naked?) poor poor pobre kitty.

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  2. Well, I've always had a weakness for sexy beasts like that big Dominican mancat. He can park his paws at my house anytime. ; ) Please don't allow him on the internet dating sites. Can you imagine the havoc he'd cause with women?

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  3. LOL, nice hacking there, woman. :-)

    The cat asked me to say that you oversimplify everything but he's fine with your account of his life.

    He would like to add two things:

    - What we love about him: he's very handsome and hunts cockroaches like no other, and

    - What he loves about us: we think that he's very handsome and hunts cockroaches like no other.

    And now, could he have his blog back?

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  4. psst Estorbo, we think you might want to contact your CATtorneys about invasion of privacy and defamation of character!

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  5. We cat owners knew all that really. But the drama queens do love a bit of attention from fans around feeding regimes, and we need to humour them. Anyway, his pictures don't look like a cat who suffers, either from pellet deprivation or hyperthyroidism. In fact, he sometimes has an uncanny resemblance to Billy Bunter.....

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  6. I suspect the three of you could,severally or jointly, teach some of today's journalists a thing or two...

    When do they calle for Bloggies nominations?

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  7. There's something deliciously hilarious in the woman hacking THIS blog because everybody is getting on the cat's side. Oscar Wilde must be laughing in hisgrave.

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  8. Hermano, you need to get a new password with out the word "pelleds" in it! Your Wooman, she is too funny!!!

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