I wen'. I came bag. I doan' wan' to talgh abou' eed.
Bod you see whad I had to endure, yes? A waideen' room. Weeth...d a r g s. Thees darg's name was Rex. You know whad thees means, yes?: KEENG!
Por fabor. I yam DON Estorbo de la Bodega Dominicana hearmeroareeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!
Pff.
I yam AOK, they say. My blord tes' say the Typhoid lebels are 3.3. Good.
Wadebber.
Can you essplain to me eef I yam so normal why I maghe projectile bomeet all ober the bathroom?
Ees "bleep" in my treadmen', they say. The Wooman ees happy. I yam normal.
She has no i dea.
She say maybe eed ees the essitemen'.
Ob wad? I say.
Frarm bein' a celebretay! she say.
Como? I say.
Arn the corber of a boogh! she say.
Oh, thad. Thad's northeen'.
(An' where ees my forgheen' cheghe?! Een the mail???)
I wan' my own forgheen' boogh!
Goody.
Ees new word. Ebery time I say forgheen A! the wooman say I mos replace weeth "oh, goody". She say my language ees bad.
Word.
Pee Ess: a messayge frarm my oh goody sponsor: The Wooman say I mos say thad VERG arn Warren Street are the best oh goody vets een the whole oh goody world!
They are OK. We hab been to manymanymany vets. We know.
OK?
Estorbo, I am sure it was the raccoon flu. Those bastards (oh, I am sorry for my language) must go!!
ReplyDeleteI am thrilled you are okay. I have learned tonight that some family members are considering a move to Brooklyn. I hope if I visit them, I will see you up on the roof and you will wave at me.
wokay
ReplyDeleteOh goody!
ReplyDeleteFeel free to write to me when you need to say "forgheen". I do understand.
ReplyDeleteI am so forgheen happy that you're OK and the typhoid is being kept under control.
And I think it's forgheen fabulous that you are on a book cover.
Rock on!
Oh Don E, I think your audience would be more concerned about a sudden change in language habits than by projectile vomiting. Certainly on Vet Day, and several days before and after, you should be able to use all the curse words you can muster.
ReplyDeleteIf that wooman smartens up your language, it will no longer be "your" blog, Hermano.
ReplyDeleteBut we are glad your lebels are OK.
Happy you are doing well, hermano! But I think the Wooman may be stifling your freedom of speech ... making yompa on the First Amendment. Forgheen right!
ReplyDeleteNice Ved report, Estorbo. Maybe the bomiting was induced by a hairball? It IS shedding season, you know. Stay well.
ReplyDeleteDon Estrobo de la Bodega Dominica should not have to say 'oh goody'....
ReplyDeleteDon Estrobo de la Bodega Dominica should not have to say 'oh goody'....
ReplyDeleteEstorbo-no you just speak the way you want. It is part of your wonderful personality.
ReplyDeleteHuman keeps thinking that Animal Planet's Must Love Cats show just has to feature you soon. You are her second favorite cat-after moi of course.
Oh, for forg's sake! "Oh goody"?? No, no, no!! That's just forgheen WRONG!! Especially when confronted with such outrages as dargs and typhoid.
ReplyDeleteOur sweet Maren had to spend two nights in the ER last week (she was very, very sick but is back to her wonderful self now) and the day we went to pick her up, a darg was *giving birth* right there in the lobby!!! I tell you, the things you see in vet's offices...
I am human so I cannot swear in public.
ReplyDeleteBut you are a cat and Don Estorbo does not say "oh goody".
Besides, forgheen is not a bad word.
Hola! The Secretary has asked us to send you this link
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MgEYbyAGdys
She says to put it here in case you forget to check your email!
(Oh, goody fonny!)
"Goody", "word"? It sounds to me as though you are a cat in search of one's own meaning or identity...
ReplyDeleteAnd I'm quite happy to hear that most everybody in here would miss the colourful language. After all, this is the way we speak at home... ;-)
Oh Beence..I can see your mother shaking her head in Canada right now. I like Estorbo's ,ah, earthy approach to language. ; )
ReplyDelete