Was a ber' beesy weegh. Was nice weathair so I sad arn the roop an' honted peegeons. I looghed por the raccoon. I sharpen' my claws een case I see the bastardo. I weell keell heem.
Then I was ber' hongree, so I stole sorm sausages. The wooman was angry. BADCAD!
I was so stress' by the screameen' thad I yad to taghe a nab. Then the Smoothman napped too. Hees head ees weigheen' a lard. My eensides ees squashed.
More stress. The Ladycad came an' sang songs to me through the weendow. I hade hor.
So I had to resd a beet more. Wooman, why you taghe peecture when I yam tryeen' to be privade? Go. Ay. Way.
Was so essiteen'! I foun' a ped! Beeg, beeg ant. I wadged eed all day. Then the man put my ped arn the roof. I cry. So cruel.
Sheet. I ged a new war drobe. For sommer. I loogh reedeeculous.
Maybe I can go to Arxpord Uneeberseedy now? I woul' lighe to be arn the roween' team. I yam ballast.
Yes, I know whad thad ees.
I taghe anorder res'. The new clothes maghe me crazee.
The Wooman says I loogh like a bat.
I tell hor I yam Vampire. She say she know thad already.
We hab dreenks and nachos arn the terrace. I lighe tortilla cheeps weeth spicy salsa.
Eed maghe me dronk, onmanageable and 'rowdy'.
Now I mos go. Ees time to essplain thad eed ees WORN hour pas' my deener time.