Here I yam, keeng ob my terazza. Sorbeyeen' my terreetoree, hopeen' the Wooman weell leab me alone.
Ees my frien' Hugo. He ees a lion, bod I tell heem he loogh a beed forghed orp. He look more como a cow weeth bad hair.
Thees ees me thees morneen' weeth my medeeceen, grass. I yab a small badplace arn my cheen an' the Wooman has been robbeen' steenky storf arn my faze to maghe eed bairder. Thees morneen I scream when she try to cleep my claws so I doan' make-a scratcha arn my faze, and she say, Shshshshsh, Estorbo, the neighbours weell hear you. Yiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, I scream, they SHOUL' dheear me, because you are abuseen' me!!!
Yoomans. No respeghd.