Thees ees me onder the table arn the terrazza today. I was helpeen' my meesers ged eento hor boogh, Seben Peelaars ob Weesdom by TE Lawrence. I said I woul' be Feisel. You shoul' see my camel.Anyway.
Por my blagh brorders een Cape Town: thees ees how I med the Wooman.
Een 2000 she had bad carf, an' she coul' nard seeng. So she go to plaze`call' Chelsea Garden Center een Eas' Billage an' work selleen' flowers and plantas. Arn the same day she ged there, een weenter ob March, I go straigh' to harspital. She no meed me. She yos hear thad the blagh cad whad work there to catch the rattones, get eenjored bad weeth broken jaw an' go to harspital after drageen' heemself bag behine' the cash registor, bleedeen' (you can heear the biolins, no?).
So. Time goes by. Teegh, teegh, teegh. The lady Rose, who taghe me to harsiptal', taghes me to hor house arn Staten Island to ged bairder after 6 weeks weeth my jaw wired shot. There I leeb een hor son' s room weeth rock posters arn the door thad I maghe eento shreds when I make-a scratcha. She say to people ad work, Who can taghe thees cad? Rose ees a bery kine' lady bod she an' hor hosban', who ees a Viednam ved, smoghe a lard ob part an' I yam geddeen' high every day. So my meesers say. I doan' need a cad. Ees too moch responsibilitee.
Rose essplain thad when I was a keetten hor frien' foun' me een a barx een a bodega arn the Lower Eas' Side. The frien' bought me, an' then she went away arn harliday an' ask Rose to babyseet me. She nebber came bagh. Rose's two cads yomped arn my head every day, an' she decided to breeng me to Chelsea to leeb een arfice an' catch the rattones, wheech I deed, lineen' them orp ebery morneen' een a row.
So my meesers leestens to the story an' after a weegh she say. OK, show me the cad. An' Rose breeng me frarm Staten Island een an Onattracteev Grey Barx, arn the ferry, arn the sobway, to 2nd Street een the Eas' Billage. She led me oud ob the barx een a little shed. I spread myselb oud arn the counter. My meesers carm an' loogh ad me. He has small head she says. I loogh at hor, She loogh ad me. She says I weell theenk. I theenk Rose ees mad because now she mos' carry me BAGH to Staten Island arn the sobway an' the ferry, to smoghe some more part.
I tell you the res' manana...
don es, we reading how you meet your meesers with the baited breath, the eyes popping out, the claws digging .... oooooh, we know about those unattractive boxes and the subway. me and huwi thinking dna testing good idea for to show we are brothers. it will mean you have 10 brothers/sisters but we don know where they all are. so don be rude about the english, see? espeshil when our frenz cuthbert an clarence send you pikshas - they B I G tabeez. an english. Adios.
ReplyDeleteGracias por writeen' een the barx...Deed H-H-Huwi, nard lorn to wride?
ReplyDeleteClarence..I forged, I forged.
Today ees raineen' cads an d*a*r*g*s. Ees global warmeen'-sheet. I theenk Meester Bush beeldeen' ark. Maybe Cothbairt an' Clarence need ark or sweemeen' lessons por the flards.
You know een America ees Smallcads. They theenk I yam enourmous. I yam 18-20lbs, wheech ees healthy, I theenk. You cads loogh beeg too. Maybe H-H-H-uwi weigh less?
Don Es
HHHuwi, he can write but he sleepin a lot in winter. he sending ola, he will write soon, when wake long enuf. we are B I G but not as big as our wet tabee frenz from devon or our BIG brother in nyc. we about 15lbs but that HHHuwi, in winter he is fat boy, BIG tummy. the undercarriage like lion, it sway from side to side when he walks. we call it his vuiton (as in LLLouis), his classy hand lugij. he a stylish boy. but nard gay (not that there is anything wrong ...) it is raining here too, the big winter storm. we all need ark. that meesta bush, we scratcha hole in hisa ark.
ReplyDelete