blank'/> The Libe ob Don Estorbo de la Bodega Dominicana: No solution

Saturday, July 3, 2010

No solution

I yam een denial. See een tarp peecture smallspart arn my tormmy? Thees ees the oldes' spart where I weell nard starp to leeckleeckleeck. I can reach eed eben enemy* Home Depot Short.

[*Freudian sleep]

SPEELL EEN AISLE 5!!!!!!

Sorry.

I yam goeen' a beet loco.

Sheet, I yam tired. Berber tired. Frarm all the leeckeen'.

I yab feeneesh' my antibioticas.

No change. Las' time they feexed me. Las' time also the spart was only worn arn my shouldhair, an' I coul' nard reach een my redcoad.

Bod. I yab lorned to taghe arf the redcoad. Ees easy. I yos pull the belcro weeth my teeth an' voila! I yam free. Then I go LEECKYLEECKLYLEECKY lighe crazee arn my shouldhair.

Two sparts arn shouldhair, worn arn leg, worn arn tormmy.

We doan' know why. Yessepd that I yam forgheen' eetchy. Bod my forr looghs goo', no?


We hab change' food. I ged no snaghs no treads no mango no forgheen' northeen'. Yessept pequeno piece ob yogurt while I was arn antibioticas.

The Wooman say the ved says neghs step ees steroids.

An' the Cooooooooooooooooone ob Shaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaame.

Ees a clarth cone, nard plasteec. Bod then how can I wash?

I mos' wash. Eben now I can wash.

I mos be clean I mos be clean I mos be clean I mos be clean I mos be clean I mos be clean I mos be clean I mos be clean I mos be clean I mos be clean I mos be clean I mos be clean I mos be clean I mos be clean I mos be clean I mos be clean

So tired.

I yam readeen' abou las plantas wheech can help me.

Maybe I yam crazee.

Maybe I weell worgh for Home Depot por the res' ob my libe.

SPEELL EEN AISLE 5!!!!!

12 comments:

  1. Poor Estorbo. Pergaps some cheery music will help?
    http://theunbearablebanishment.blogspot.com/2010/07/play-me-5288-keys.html

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  2. what about getting another cat ? I know that's tricky as it could be a total disaster but maybe ... it would be the perfect distraction.

    We love your blog. Bleet, Oliver & Gus
    the cats from Black Street

    ps the woman takes great photos

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  3. Your frustration is so heartbreaking.
    But you do look gorgeously handsome and you are berber funny.

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  4. You know Estorbo, even if your shoulder spots, your leg spot and your tummy spots are not spotless, you will still be the best looking cat south of Quebec City. Paws down. (And here I would add, permit me to quote you, dayeen, dayoud.) Much Love from MademoiselleCaroline, Boo and Ezio.

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  5. Let me know if you figure it out. My poor KonaKitty--her entire ventral side is bald from all the leekyleeky, too.

    MomKat Trish

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  6. ask the wooman bowt a consulltayshun at the aneemal medicull senter in manhatin.
    they hav lots a speshullists -- prolly evin a skin doctor hoo mite noe sumpin latest an gratest.

    hav ya tryd benadrill creem or cortade or sumpin liek taht frum the farmasee?

    i feel yer pane my brutha -- cant be gud inna xtra cote in this heet.

    ~^:^~

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  7. Alexander (the Great)July 4, 2010 at 11:09 AM

    Do you just want to be smooth, like the Smoothman?

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  8. Oh Estorbo, dear me, what a situation, you poor thing. If you have to wear the dreaded cone, and you are terribly stressed out, maybe your woman could chat to the vet about getting you some valerian root. You'll probably like it a lot - it's a bit like catnip - and it will help with your stress and anxiety. Help you to chill out. Maybe even help curb you obsessive licking? You can get the actual root, dried - sprinkle on your food. Or try valerian tincture, either on your food or spritzed onto your bed or a tissue to vapourise into the air in your favourite places. Your humans may not like the smell much, but they too will find it has a calming effect on their nerves. I got it from a holistic vet when my cat Thomas's bad behaviour had me at my wit's end. It a long story but I credit valerian with getting us both through a very difficult time. Good luck to you.

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  9. Opinions are divided on the subject of those cone collars, as some cats get more and more stressed by them. But when all the tests are over, if no cause is found, people may have to decide that it's just a Bad Habit that you got into, the original cause having disappeared a long time ago. I know all this from having had my own handsome, super-glossy black cat with completely naked anklets, wristlets and tummy. He got over it eventually, but it was a slow process.

    But the Wooman must be sick of all this unsolicited advice; sorry......

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  10. My woman did some googling - allergies in cats are quite well known. Dust mites to various plants and flowers (GASP: all the stuff on the terrace!). Fexofenadine (Allegra) can help if it is allergies. She remembers a cat her sister had that was allergic to grass. My brother's dog gets benadryl off and on. My sister's cat gets itchy spots near her ears and scratches wildly and a steroid type cream sems to help some. The steroids should help if it is allergies.
    Your woman probably already knows all of this but thought I would pass it along. My woman didn't realize cats could be allergic to dust mites! Do you sleep on any wool rugs or bedcovers a lot?

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  11. Years back, my older daughter's cat was allergic to her own hair - needless to say, the only fix was to shave her hair/fur down to a quarter of an inch... "Fluffy" hated being shaved, would be insulted by the bare skin, but would come around in a few days to all the petting and hugging we gave her - we went thru this every 6-8 months... but, it helped her and was our last resort...
    I keep a pic of her (shaved) on my frig as a reminder that life is always complicated and that sometimes the easiest fixes are to get rid of something, lol...
    Best to you Estorbo - I love reading your blog - always brings a smile on my face!

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