Friday, February 25, 2011

Oud een the cole'


I yam oud een the cole'. I need the Wooman to help me weeth merchandiseen' an she say she weell, bod only eef I coogh hor deenhair.

Whad the forgue???

I doan' know how to coogh!

Why I need hor? Because I cannard use Phodosharp an' I theenk I need these eef I yam goeen' to maghe a forgheen' calendar or morgs por sale. The Woomans say morgs ees a good idea. She no use morgs She use corps. Bod whadebber.

So whad can I coogh? I can reach the gas bod I doan' know whad to do when I ged there. Fry pelleds?

Sheet.

Soon I weell pose' sorm peecture por chooseen' whad to pud arn a morg. Or corp. You mos bode por wheech worn you lighe.

Sunday, February 20, 2011

I need $'s!


 Escuse me.

The Wooman says I need to orn parket morney eef I wan' to fly to Australia. So I wan' to know. Does anyworn wan' an ESTORBO callendar, starteen' een March???

Por the wall (more beeg 8.5 eenches x 11) , or por the desk (more small, 10 eenches x 5 eenches)?Ees abou' ninteen $'s y porteen. Plos sheepeen'.

The Wooman says nobardy uses calendars no mas, y eed ees too espenseeb. I say, "Th."

Sheet:

The Wooman also yos tole' me thees ees the price weethoud prarfeet. I weell maghe no morney.

Dios mio. How can  I maghe morney? My caddle CSA barx ees nard selleen'.

My libe ees een the toilet.

Saturday, February 19, 2011

Larst


Can sormworn pleaseporfabor tell me how to ged to Australia? Where do I torn lefd?

Friday, February 18, 2011

Hola Hola Hola!


I yam bag!!!

Madre di dios, bod the yoomans are pull ob drama.

Yesserday dinahmow lefd to fly bag down ondhair an' I was ber' sad. She gabe me feesh. Sardines een oil. Yom. Also she gabe me peecture of a feesh. Thees I can reepreepreep to waghe orp the yoomans ad 4am, yes? NO! Shoud the Wooman.


Same ole' same ole'.

Styoopeed yoomans lose a bag ad the aeroporto J. Effe Que. Rosh aroun' como cheeckens weethoud heads. Almose' lose thees carmpudehair so I can blarg no mas. Eediots. Portunadely the ordhair yoomans ad the aeroporto hab brains an' sabe their bacon.


Now thad the Wooman and the Smoothman are bag I weell onbeil my gran' plan por the Roop:

I yam goeen' to raise organeec caddle. Hab I tole' you abou' my caddle? I hord them een the sommhair time. I rosh arn the roop an' shoud, Git, git, git arn leedle dargies, an' they ron, ron!

The Wooman says Eeeeeeeeeee, you harreeble cad, thad ees a carckoach, when I breeng hor worn ob my caddle frarm the roop to show hor how nice an' fad they are...Bod those were wile', free range. Now I wan' pasture-raise', super local caddle...

Anyworn eenterest' een CSA barx of caddle? I geeb you goo' price. Righ' now they are theen, bod I yam goeen' to fadden them orp.

Led me know.