Friday, July 25, 2008

Who the Main Man Now???

Arn the Wooman's blarg there ees a reference to the Main Man. I, Don Estorbo de la Bodega Dominicana, woul' lighe to sed the record straigh'.

I. Am. The. Main. Man.

Heear me roar: EEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Announcemands

Pleease. Hellooooooooooooooooooooo????

I hab new email address, OK? OK.

estorboloco[ad]gmail (dart)com

Eberybardy onnerstan' thad? No, doan wride the real parentheses (beegwor'): (ad) yos means the seembol @...An' (dart) yos means thees: .


See,

.

.

...dart = .

Bod eef I wride eed prarper, the SPAM robots weel maghe attagh, OK? OK.

Gracias.

Pee Ess. H-h-h-uwi an' Trebor remine' me eed ees our borthday soon. On Augus' 4th, Me an' H-h-h-huwi an' Trebor, an' Lennie an' Sollie. We weell have a mass, blag-cad, transcontinental celebration een Brookleen, Kalk Bay an' Eenglan'. We weell be....NINE!

My menu weel be mango an' kiwi salad, a sardine (FEESH!), and peach yoghurt.

Then I weel throw orp. Bod eed weel be so worth eed.

My nails needed treemmeen'



Sunday, July 13, 2008

Keelleen' machine

Whad???

Escuse me? Are you loogheen' ad me? Are you poindeen' thad theen' ad me?

I yam arn the sead ob ease!!!

NO! I yam nard goeen' to use my keeddee leeder no more! I wan' to use the throne!

Monday, July 7, 2008

My libe as a cad

Do I gard a story por djou?

I doan' know where to begeen:
Thees weeken', eef you can call eed thad, the Wooman had me yompeen' through hoops:

She tell' me to weed the garden. Garden? I as' hor? Thad ees a beeg wor' por a place muoi pequeno. WEED! she says! Pull oud all thad grass thad you are always cheween' arn!

Fine! I say, I weell do eed eef eed keells me!

Aghh hughgh ack agh arbgh %^&*$#@ FFRRarggghhhuuujjsh!

I feel strange so I taghe myself to the gotter to throw orp frarm the roop. Hopefully arn the head of a darg.

Estoooooooooooooooooooooooorbo, I heear hor cry. I neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeed you!

Eed nebber ends, I theenk.

Whad the forghe??? She has cobered my table een red roun' theengs and...leedle onions.

Why deed you do thees? I as'...

Because there ees no space eenside, she says.

Whad am I suppose to do weeth thees theen's, I as'?

Guard them frarm peegeeons! she say.

So I deed. I hade peegeeons. Worse than teecks.

Soon I fall asleep. When I waghe, the red theen's an' leedle onions are garn. Instead there are bags an bags ob plantas. Muchas blordee plantas. Whad do you theenk thees ees, a garden? I as' hor?


Hello? Hello? My name ees Estorbo? The keeng. Who are you?

Hello???

Smells fonnee.

I decide to ged some exercise, and go down to make scratcha.

The the Wooman leabs. Again???? I am alone. All, all alone. I hab no one . No one lorbs me. Where ees she? Who am I? Whad ees libe? Oh! I see hor. She ees cormeen' bag. An' she ees carryeen' sormetheen por me! Keeddee Leeder!

Libe has meaneeen'!

Moral ob the story. Eed ees nard the journey to the Leeder Tray thad counds, eed ees whad you fine' ad your destination.

Sheet happens.